Monday, June 30, 2008

Don't Knock It

Oma lives the Grand Life, 2007

Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Colleen
Colleen who?
Colleen all kids! It's story time!


"How 'bout some stories in the Oma Tent!"

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Paul
Paul who?
Paul up a chair and a story I'll tell.


Knock-knock
Who's there?
Lena
Lena who?
Lena little closer so I don't have to yell.

"Isn't Oma funny?"

Did you hear the story about the roof?
Never mind. It's over your head.

Did you hear the story about the skunk?
Never mind. It stinks.

Did you hear the story about Opa?
"Once upon a time, when Opa was a little boy,
he was out in the woods and decided to roast a grasshopper..."

"What's the big deal? I once ate a potato bug."

Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Foyer
Foyer who?
Foyer information, it's the Big Bad Wolf.


Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Hugh
Hugh who?
Hugh's afraid of the Big Bad Wolf?


The Originals, 1983

Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Bea.
Bea who?
Bea afraid...be very afraid.

♫ "Little Red Riding Hood,
You sure are looking good,
You're everything that a Big Bad Wolf could want.
EWOOO!..." ♫

Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Andy
Andy who?
Andy all lived happily ever after.

Why don't shoes tell stories?
Because they have a foot in their mouth.

Did you hear the story about the germ?
Nevermind. I don't want to spread it around.

"Opa's outrageous!"

Did you hear the story about skinny dipping?
"Once upon a time when Opa was just a little boy
he liked to go swimming down at the mill race..."

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Avenue
Avenue who?
Avenue heard that story before?


Sam, I Am

Knock-knock
Who's there?
Salada
Salada who?
Salada bad jokes going around here!

I've written myself a little script so I can present a story hour at the Hero Camp Out. It could easily be broken up into 15-minute chunks (or stretched into hours if my audience begs me!) I compiled some jokes and attention grabbers from an excellent book called Storytime Stretchers by Naomi Baltuck. A few favorite fairy tales, (with new surprise endings) are condensed between silly songs with actions (I've found them in old Brownie Scout booklets and grade-school resource books) and some true stories about their ancestors (us) as little kids. It's been SO fun! But I need to go practice!

Knock-Knock
Who's there?
Althea
Althea who?
Althea later, Alligator!


7 comments:

Ashlee said...

You are such a good Oma! :0) I bet your grandkids just love you to pieces. :0)

Joy Des Jardins said...

These are great Knock Knock jokes....no wonder your grandkids think your wonderful....so would I. You're the best Marty.

Sheri said...

Can I be one of your grandkids? Is there a International Award for best Oma in the Universe? I nominate you!

kenju said...

You put all other grandmothers to shame! Especially me.

Sandra Ferguson said...

Very cute. My son loved his own version of knock-knock.

Knock knock.
Who's there?
Big bad wolf banana split.

Now it that funny? Nooooo. Does it make sense? Noooo. But when my son was three, he could and did tell the same knock knock joke over and over, laughing out loud until he fell over. Humble audience that we were, we simply laughed at his go time.

Great memories.

diane said...

Oh you are too punny! What lucky grandkids you have!

The World According To Me said...

Your grandchildren must have so much fun with you.