Since I was ten years old I have had a jar of Mentholatum next to my bed. I rub some in my nose every night; I don't even remember why. I just need to...so I won't get stuffy, I guess. Besides, it's an aromatic comfort smell.
In the newspaper today I read that Vaseline, Vick's Vapo-Rub and Mentholatum should never be placed inside your nose because it can cause some rare kind of pneumonia if you inhale it into your lungs. (You know, I can actually feel it clogging up my lobes and latching onto my bronchi's as I type! I'd just never noticed it before.)
I guess I'm at risk of dying. I've been so irresponsible! First it was gnawing on my #2 lead pencil, and now this! I belong in a home for the unfit.
But now what? Do I stop using it just because I read the article? What if I hadn't read the article? I'd be happily mentholating right now, breathing free and clear. And besides, I've been at risk of dying ever since I was born. It's just grease, people! It's not like I'm an alcoholic or a heroin addict. Come on! Let me have an aroma fix!
What do you do when you find out that your life style may kill you? Do you gratefully change your ways as you comply with the FDA, FEMA and the seat belt law, or do you say, "Eat, drink and mentholate, for tomorrow we may die, and I want to breathe in life to the fullest!"
I've come to a decision: I'M GOING FOR IT!! I lived through the honey on the pacifier scare, I made it through the poisonous Tylenol episode, I slept on my stomach and escaped crib death, I sometimes lied and swam before my 1/2 hour was up. It seems I'm lucky at these turns in scientific discoveries.
If you're a little wiser than I, and have chucked all the Chinese toys, asbestos and Vicks throughout your house, you're welcome to drop over to my house about 10 pm and sit close enough to get a whiff. Just relax into it. You don't have to get all stuffy about it.